I have the joy of watching an adorable girl child at our church grow up. She is bold and confident without being annoying. The adults around her are molding her without breaking off the best parts. I hope they can continue to walk this delicate line.
Although only 2 years old, this little girl doesn't hold back.She radiates enthusiasm and joy. Her purpose in life is to have fun and laugh. She assumes the right to be alive with every cell of her body. If her parents continue to nurture this in her, she'll be light years ahead of others her age when she reaches adulthood.
I vividly remember being a child and the adults around me constantly chiding "Behave yourself." Sometimes they changed the message a little with "Don't be so bold".
At first I had a hard time remembering either dictum but eventually, I learned how I was expected to behave and
to bury my boldness under acceptable manners. I even learned not to question why this was so important. It simply became easier to go along to get along.
Like most women, these
rules controlled my behavior for too many years. I assumed the adults knew what was best for me and never challenged that assumption when I became an adult myself. I gave away my power and wisdom, losing sight of how vital it was for me to boldly live out my dreams.
Happily, I began to ask questions about those rules a few years back. I'll be the first to admit I don't have it perfect yet. After all, those childhood messages run deep. But I am assuming my right to be alive with every cell of my body. I'm learning to trust my own wisdom, knowing my parents didn't always get it right, although they did the best they could.
The point is, you have a choice. Continue to accept the old rules from your childhood or create a new set of operating instructions for your adult self — one who has her own life wisdom to draw on. The one who remembers the amazing person you were before the adults got hold of you.
The opposite of "Behave Yourself" is a little old-fashioned misbehavior. Don't accept the rules just "because". You really do have a choice. Assume your right to be bold. Pursue your dreams with every fibre of your being.
Some questions to explore:
What am I assuming to be true?
What would happen if it wasn't true?
What's really the truth here?
What's one bold action I can take today towards my dreams?